OneTaste Audio: How I Learned About Love (from Orgasm)

Here’s the audio from a lecture I recently gave on what Orgasm taught me about love. Recorded at OneTaste NYC on 3/4/15.


read more

Something New…

Originally posted on



Hey OM Hub. My name is Eli and I OM. For the last 6+ years, almost every day I OM. I put a finger on a clitoris and stroke it. For me. In a connected way. It has changed me in both relatable and unspeakable ways. I shared at an I OM meeting tonight that OM has helped me to open my heart in spots where I would normally withhold myself.… read more


On Thanksgiving I was with a bunch of my closest friends and we did that thing where everybody goes around and says what they’re grateful for. I thought about it as my turn approached and took a general accounting of my life. A few years ago, that mental “are my bases covered?” question would usually look like a rundown of a checklist including certain account balances, whether my car was clean, oil change recently done?, basically a bunch of regular, practical life concerns.… read more


When I lived in Boulder I joined the local PUA MeetUp group just to see what was shaking. It turned out not much and soon the organizer of the MeetUp abandoned it. I bought his MeetUp out for like $20 and started sending invitations to TurnON. Nobody ever showed up. Except one day this good looking, affable guy in his 20s walked in and introduced himself as the former organizer of the MeetUp.… read more

Poignant Parable

As a child, I heard a parable at Tassajara that has stuck with me.

A revered Abbot of a monastery in ancient China had a million students. People came from hundreds of miles to hear his dharma talks.
One season, his son was struck down by disease and eventually died.
On the eve of his son’s death the abbot was beside himself with grief.… read more

To come, or to become, that is the question.

As I’m opening to let something old drop away, or letting something new come in I remember that allowing myself to move with it and allowing it to move through me is where my power lies. Not in gripping or in conditions imposed (which will soon be dust anyways) but in opening just a little bit more and finding the new definition of freedom.… read more

Chicken Heart



I knew it was coming but I hadn’t cried yet. My grandmother had died a couple days beforehand. I felt sad, but my heart was taking its own time. I was sitting with some friends and by chance we had ordered Jewish food to go including matzo ball soup. My grandmother was a consummate chef and Jewish cultural food polymath.… read more

Everything in it’s right place



A quick post I have to type out – We talk a lot in this work about the benefits of turning women on vs fixing (healing, reforming, the list goes on) them. Fixing being a derivative of the pervasive, disempowering broken-wing bird –> white knight complex I have found myself ensnared in a few times in my life. Learning how to turn women on has a distinctly different flavor than fixing though both can create resentment.… read more

Kingdom Come

Links are in bold.

It was the end of the night. I was sitting in my back row seat at TurnOn San Francisco. 50 courageous people had just played three intimacy games and the room was quietly buzzing as the very last person said the very last thing of the very last game of the night, which is ironically known as “Intimacies”.… read more

If the shoe fits…

So I have a female house guest this week. First off, I should say this is no ordinary female house guest. This is a hot, smart, Turned-On Woman with big brown bedroom eyes and boundless energy. She is the kind of woman most of me would do almost anything to please, for whom in my previous lives I would put my own needs and petty preferences away in order to win her favor and have things “go smoothly”.… read more